Mom's Birthday with a Blessing

Today would have been my Bio Mother's birthday. I've dealt with many firsts this year, but this one seems to be the hardest. The thought of never knowing her has been the worst for me to come to terms with on this long journey. The day I saw her name on my adoption papers and birth certificate all I could do was stare and there were actually no words to be said. I think often  how everything might have affected her throughout the journey of her earthly life.

I was asked to do a specific song for a church solo in a couple of weeks. I had never heard the song, but it really says so much to me. Over the past few years there were those times I just felt that God wasn't hearing me. This wasn't what I wanted. I didn't want to know I had been adopted......I didn't want my Dad to reject me, and I didn't want to deal with knowing my Mom had left me......again. That God took her away before I could know her. While learning this song and digging deep into the words and meaning, I then realized that God doesn't give us what we want, but he gives us what we need.

So, in closing, I know I will see my Mom one day. For now I just want to say, " Happy Birthday Mom. I love you more than words can say. You are and always will be my Blessing."